i found a maple-syrup-flavor ham hot pocket, now to heat it up

first episode, testing testing 123

Someone threw scalding-hot honey buns at me. Why is this a trend?

all your maple syrup expired.

grass and wheat are related, right? maybe there's some wheat here to make pancakes

ok, the honey bun jokes is unfunny now, you're actually setting them on fire

wait, we need a pot to cook in, how can we make a pot or get one?

found a bowl and some of those tappers for maple syrup. we can mix this with our honey bun syrup. also, we need to make a way to catch those honey buns people keep on throwing at us.

we should make a shelter (preferably one that doesn't break when you throw a honey bun at it)

why do you keep on hitting me with scalding hot microwaved honey buns? Like someone actually slapped me with one and it gave me a burn!

Santa MU-.ST O.N=LY say "fuckin' workshop" o-v..er and o-v..er again. Everyone else is extremely bewildered

You must survive using only a cup of water, a pack of sliced bread, a tent and a AK-47

Question from viewer "Sancla": Fuckin' workshop Hans, fuckin' workshop.

Survive with 500 ml water, 1 pack sliced bread, 2 cups of pepsi, outlet, 500$ gift card, paper with routes to nearest airport, paper with routes to santas fucking workshop, free ticket to Manaus and a trash can.

You must survive using only a liter of water, 2 packs of sliced bread, 1 bandaid, pen, paper, a outlet, 200$, a bouncy castle, a phone that only shows routes to the airport and a free ticket to Belo Horizonte

Question from viewer "Santa Claus": Hey fuckin hans, i heard you make fun of my fucking workshop on the show. youre just fuckin jealous i can say "fuckin workshop" over and over again without getting tired.

i found out how to make honey buns, and now I got honey buns to throw at the people who throw scalding hot honey buns at me.

pack of wolves attack Hans

ooh, mushrooms, i hope they aren't poisonous

guys who crashed a 2024 cybertruck into my shelter???

who asked the cast of "Just a Prank Bro?" to throw a nuclear honey bun at me???

opinion on rhenium?

continue: oh, they meant the numbers, not actually homeless people, also, i rebuilt the shelter, now with more honey bun defence!

Canada said they plan to cut homeless people in half by 2025. I hope they don't cut me in half!

i just found a person who hanged himself and i'd like to say: don't commit suicide

mmm, honey bun defence

What happened to Pastry Pete, the decoy of you you made to dodge people throwing honey buns at you?

can you explain what happened?

What if you die? Who will be the new host of this show?

(You can't say anything with the letter E) Opinion on constrained writing?

are people still trying to throw honey buns at you??? Also how's Pastry Pete?

S O U P

hans finds a note on the ground saying "february 23, 2019 - ligma balls"

i found bigfoot - oh wait, it's just a fursuit

pastry pete found dead in a ditch

homeless hans please stop yapping about the kitsune, you're probably scaring it, maybe go talk about people throwing honey buns at you

real kitsune spotted in the Canadian forest, we be chill though

flowers start growing